All about my mother

Happy mothers day, Ive had a terrible/stressful weekend but I'll carve (haha no pun intended) out a little non culinary face time to talk about my mother. I haven't celebrated mother's day with her in for nearly a decade. She died in 2000 when i was just entering my teen years, a fragile time to loose a mother. She had cancer since i was in her womb. Her doctors told her once i came out, she should start chemo on her breast and forgo breast feeding. but my mom was no match, she was like, "no way will me daughter grow up on formula! I'll breast feed her until she's ready to eat on her own!". And so she did, and completed a round of chemo successfully after she breast fed me for nine months. My mother was a bit of an astronaut, as my dad called her. Loving to explore new places and meeting new people. Its amazing how many friends she knew! very different from my dad who was a bit of an extrovert and less social. She told me she always wanted to be a flight attendant, she loved flying (i totally didn't get THAT gene, i hate flights!) and loved traveling. But she actually had a masters in urban planning although never really did that. She bounced around doing marketing for various companies. She was in no way a housewife, she always worked even when she had chemo again when i was in their grade when her breast cancer came back. She lost her hair completely the second time around. In that time, cancer wasn't very chic like it is today with Melissa Ethridge proudly shaking her bald head at the Grammy's. So she was very shy and upset about being bald. But it was fun going with her to the wig shop (note, i should NEVER be platinum blond!) and trying on crazy wigs. she was very healthy about it though, she ate well and exercised every morning. and I honestly never remember her in pain of i bed a lot. she wasn't "sick" to me. She was so cool in that as healthy as she was, she would take me every so often McDonald's and order a Big Mac, one of her prized foods. she knew this wasn't healthy, and mind you, she did take off the third bun on it (which is perfectly good to do, who needs three buns!). Anyhow, she did have a great appetite. she never restricted junk food at all, but she also wasn't inclined to buy unhealthy snacks like sugary cereals and those kiddie fruit by the foot stuff. That's why my lunches in school were so odd. I had stuff like pita with hummus or a tuna and corn salad (a very good salad, mind you!) with literally a hunk of chocolate for dessert! how weird, right? Its strange though because i found all these diet books on her book case (old diet books, like "fit or fat" and Susan powder books) but i never remember her following them. Anyhow, fast forward to when i was about 12 when the cancer came back again. This time it was breast cancer cells in the lung. This time, it took her life about a year and half later. She was only bed ridden about a month before she died, and i don't even think she thought she was dying. So when she did die, it was a bit of a shock to everyone, despite the fact that people knew breast cancer and her were on a on/off relationship for a while. I cried i a lot before she died, but no so much after, strangely enough. It was like a weight was lifted. We buried her near where she grew up in Israel. Its actually a lovely cemetery with only about 20 graves, not like a death row most cemetery's resemble. Its in the outskirt hills of Jerusalem, and it looks more like a hidden cove than a cemetery. I hated the funeral, simply because i didn't want to see people cry and get all sappy because i find that contagious and it made me that way too. My mother's absence has unfortunately stirred up some problems with my mental health. For a while, i was so scarred for my dad's life because i was afraid to be an orphan. I think loosing a mother before you enter high school can be daunting. I didn't have a mother primp me for prom or "lunch" with, or go bra shopping. I dragged my dad, poor thing, but he's been awesome, he's had women around him all his life so he's in the know with female issues as opposed to most fathers. I actually usually give my dad a gift on mother's day because i think he's been great at trying to be mom. This is getting long and i to be honest, i am beginning to tear up writing this so I'll wrap this up. Have a wonderful mothers day everybody!