So the orientation is on friday at 11 am (so long chic breakfast spread), and i just thought about how lonely i feel going in. I suppose i started this blog to sort of give me the sense that someone, somewhere, cares about what i am going through and sort of "backing me" up. I dont know anyone, and i dont know if i'll "click" with people there, i mean the ages can range from 17-70. i wish i had a friend going a long with me, you know to gossip with about the teachers, talk about the work, the mishaps, the spills, all that good stuff. Thats mainly why i am sharing this with you (which i am even doubting a little too because not many have commented). anyhow, i am very indpendent and do fine on my own, but i would like to feel some sort of social life spurring from this.
and on a completly different note, i saw a post somewhere about reasons its not that fun being thin. I am not out to offend anyone of any size, i think the best size is one your happiest in, but i get a lot of flack for being thin and small. sure i exercise and eat try to healthfully, but i dont monitor my weight daily or aspire to fit some sort of thin ideal. For the record, ive always been slightly smaller. my hands and feet are teeny (i wear a size 6 or 5 shoes, my nike running shoes were from the kids line and 60 bucks less!). i am not complaining about my size, i just thought i'd humor you with some points about why its not always great to be thin.
-people grab you, or at least me. Its like they have to feel my body to make sure i exist or something, i am sure pregant people get this done to their belly. anyhow, unless i love you and am trying to give you a hug, keep your paws off my body.
-nothing fits. yea, often i am just too short for jeans and forget about the kiddie dept, cause i DO have hips (hey i went through puberty), i am just not tall and lanky.
-people assume i dont have an appetite or dont enjoy food, but i can actually wolf down a lot at once. id be a good candidate for an eating contest. gross, but i might have a chance. And i love to eat, i enjoy it very much so!
-I cant give blood. i need to weigh more than 115 lbs, believe me i want to do good, but i guess ill have to donate my hair or something.
-I am always cold, although i admit ive been better about this, the summer has made me more tolerate to colder temps because as much as i dislike being cold, i loathe being too hot
-people think iam weak and frail, that is until they see me flex. I strength train a lot more than i used too and have a bulging bicep!
dont take these too seriously, i just wanted to poke fun at myself, we all need to from time to time.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
6 comments:
Hi! I just want to let you know that I enjoy reading your blog and I wish you the best of luck in culinary school. I can't wait to hear about it! I'm 22 and I started reading "nutritious junk" a few months ago. I have also thought about going to cooking school, but I'm in therapy for disordered eating, so I don't think it's such a great idea. Anyway, I'm sure you'll make many friends :) Good luck tomorrow!
Hey there, I'm next to you in the skinniness (and it sucks!) I want to donate blood and fit into clothing, not to start on being judged about it! Even so, part of my problem also is the disordered eating idea. The truth is, just about every American deals with disordered eating: guilt at over-eating/junk-eating, classifying food as good/bad, punishment or rewards through food, it's all disordered eating.
azelema, there is a fantasitc blogger http://everywomanhasaneatingdisorder.blogspot.com/ who is a therapist and believes every woman has some form of body image/food/ problem. Since being thin, i've been to therapists and eating disorder experts to "analyze me" (but mainly from depression since my mother died), but since i was thin, my father was often worried about this, so i did see many experts. I was never diagnosed with anything, and i even was worried if i was becoming a sort of self fulfilling prophecy because i was so thin, people expected me to have a problem. but ive come to realize i am not obsessed with food, i am obssesed with joy and cooking and thats mainly why i decided on culinary school. Thanks for replying! i was begining to think i am talking to wall
Hi there! I just started reading your blog a few weeks ago and just wanted to say hi! I totally understand the whole "skinny" problem. Do you freeze in AC too? I have two sweaters and a wrap in my desk at work as I always freeze! Anyways I hope you have a great time at culinary school. Be careful with the knives though :)
I don't get the cold feeling too much, unless my feet are, then no matter what I'm cold! I'm naturally thin as well as having too many judgments on food (as I was attempting to explain in my last post), and it sucks some times! One thing I hate is when people try to force junk food down my throat "of you only eat donuts and cake all the time, you'll gain weight and feel better!" no, I'll get sick! Hehe.
I hear you on the lenght of pants. If a person is getting such a small size chances are they are not 6 feet tall! Anyway, on the blood donation, have actually looked into this because I am unable to give blood and it's actually 110 110 lbs. Does that help?
Post a Comment