Cheese Store Field Trip!

Today we went on a field trip to the Beverly Hills Cheese store. Its about 50 years old and one of the oldest cheese stores in the country actually. Its small but very classy, old registers and meat slicers. Ironically enough, my stomach has a strong aversion to cheese. I never warmed up to like it and when i have had it on rare occasions, i got severe stomach pains. But i understand that as a chef i should be familiar with all food mediums. The guy who gave us the bulk of the tour was so sweet. It was very refreshing to see someone so passionate about cheese! We sampled cheeses (duh) but also some good olive oils, cured meats, salami, mustard, and this fig cake which i couldn't get enough of. they served it with a sheep's milk Gouda, but i brushed off the cheese and ate as much on this fig cake that was left on the sample tray. We still had to show up in "semi" uniform (as in we just needed our jackets and shoes, although i forgot about the shoes and wore my bright pink nikes, very classy, no?). It was funny walking back to my car, someone asked me if i am a chef and i said, "no, this is a costume". I was obviously joking but he believed me for second (hey, its la, you never know...). I can't lie and say i am 100% ok these days. I am actually falling a little a bit into this depressive hole i was in when i started culinary school. this whole website getting exposed thing i think made this negative aura around me and i think the whole class collectively hates me. I hope this won't affect me cooking, but i am just not happy right now, and its seeping to outside the kitchen as well. I already have self esteem issues, and having a bunch of haters doesn't aid that. I feel the relationship between my dad and i is deteriorating as well which is upsetting because i want to make him proud because he's done so much helping me pay for school and all. I need to start seeing a therapist again. I saw therapists since my mom died when i was 13 and stopped when i went to college. Than in college i started seeing one again and when i moved back home to go to culinary school, i sort of stopped therapy period. I am sorry to make this a sad post, i am just really upset lately. don't worry, more upbeat posts to follow.

Retraction

It has come to my attention that this blog has been viewed by most of my peers. To those offended by the comments i have made, from the bottom of my heart, I am so sorry. Understand that this blog is a diary of sorts and i forget that this is accessible to the whole world and that anyone can view it. Please, understand that my view points are probably made because of my ignorance about certain situations, and i try to be funny and together, it can come up as hurtful. I was about to cancel the whole blog, but i still feel i should document my journey, but from now on I will no longer gossip about ANYONE (even chefs and top chef contestants). To those i have hurt, i respect you to the bone and hope you accept my since apologizes. I meant no harm, everything should be taken with a grain of salt (kosher salt, of course).

"Cooking" Demo

so i went to the book festival yesterday and Brian Malarkey (from Miami Top Chef season) signed my book and gave me a hug. I saw Padma Lakshami's scheduled cooking demo too. It was rather silly, everything was already made basically and she didn't even assemble anything! she made goat cheese flauntas and after she assembled one, she asked someone from the audience to do the rest and fry them! in the meantime, she did a reading from her book. I think she is gorgeous and not your typical "model/actress" but i don't think she's a chef, and i have a feeling she didn't come up with the recipes in her book all on her own. I love that she proudly displays her scar shamelessly. I have a scar too on my right shoulder, not as noticeable as hers but still, a good conversation starter (although i never wear tank tops). Anyways, here's the picture of Padma "cooking". the line for her to sign was too long and it was 90 degrees outside and i was already beginning to resemble a lobster.

Tea Party!

Our chef went to New Orleans Thursday and he only comes back on Tuesday. We have a sub who i absolutely love. He's laid back and very chill-axed, no drill sergeant methods of teaching. Not that our subject for yesterday was that hard, tea sandwiches. We had a whole lecture of "tea" and what's served with classic "tea time" and as the British call is "elevenses" (an in between breakfast and lunch snack/tea time, like a daily brunch, if you will). We made some classic, albeit rather boring sandwiches like cucumber, watercress, egg-salad, smoked salmon, curried chicken, and we needed to present two "signature" ones. We were in groups of four and since chola chika excommunicated me from her aura, i was a group of fairly ok people. I am a bit bossy, i admit so we ran with my tea sandwich ideas which turned out really delicious, date and cream cheese filled sandwiches and a peanut, chicken, slices apple open faced sandwich. Tomorrow i go to the Los Angeles Times festival of books to meet some cookbook authors and hopefully get them to sign my book. I wish i could be at the Coachella music festival, but i am a book worm too so i am excited about the book festival (man i am dork). Btw, this is the Reuben from the other day, cholesterol city!

Grilled Veggie Sandwich

this is the grilled veggie. There's olive capanade in there too and "signature" side was tabouli which he said was too dry (boo!). Sorry the resolution is sorta crappy. Today we did a buffet of tea sandwiches (very english, no?) but i forgot my camera. Whats sad is that we threw most of them away, no one really wanted cucmber and watercress sandwiches.

Sandwiches!

we needed to bust out 3 snadwiches (reuben, club, and grilled veggie) with a bound salad for each. I just got home so I'll write more about them later, heres the club

what the #%@! ????

I recently came across an article in the new york times (which i find one of the few very good American newspapers) about chefs and this new cursing phenomenon (http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/16/dining/16profane.html?_r=1&ref=dining&oref=slogin). Gordon Ramsey and Anthony Bourdain, both very successful chefs, have their cussing to thank for much of their recent popularity and fame. In the food industry, or any industry with lots of stress, cussing is bound to burst. Now i am not all innocent and proper, I curse, but only when appropriate. I like to use curse words in their simplest form, without adjoining words. Like lets say i spilled something, i often say, "Shit!". this to me is ok, and spills and burns happen all the time in the kitchen, and in this context, i find it ok to curse. I DON'T find it professional or beneficial when people start to inject curse words into semi-cogent sentences like, "get me that fucking pot into my fucking hands you shithead!". This is just a) a rude, condescending request, b) bad English, period!, and c) a desperate attempt to attract attention or superiority. That said, this Chola Chika bully of mine curse without end, and not in the context of my preference. I am not offended by people cursing, but why do it for the sake of wanting to portray power or attention. Like drinking, cursing is fine in moderation. I learned it from my mother (who without shame cursed infront of me in the car while driving in rush hour traffic). But she never said, "dont curse" and hence, i never felt the need to rebel and curse. I know its not the most polite thing to do, but i admit i do it. Anyhow, what do you think?